First One

She calls from the airport and we ask her not to go. We're her parents, after all, and we want her safe. She has no fear. She's not yet twenty. It's eight years ago today and she's off to celebrate her birthday in Sweden. Our country has picked this day to invade Iraq. Shouldn't she cancel and wait to see what happens? There's no hesitation in her voice, only excitement. She knows we can't stop her, but then, we've rarely been able to do so. We try reasoning, citing ominous possibilities. I may have cried or my voice may have wavered. She is nonplussed, blissful in anticipation of seeing a dear friend and exploring her Scandinavian home. We are helpless, far from the airport where she's about to board the plane. We wait anxiously as the world changes forever. She arrives without incident and immerses herself in a culture that feels totally natural, not foreign at all. A birthday haven and one to which she'll return with her fiance to commemorate her twenty-fifth birthday.

Once, now so long ago, she'd had no birthdays. The first one was a mixture of sadness and joy. We'd recently returned from her paternal grandfather's funeral. Around our table were two grandmothers, one in mourning, and her aunt who'd come from New York to bury her father. Looking at those faces, I see youth that today has lapsed for all of us except the birthday girl. Henry, Carol and I are now nearly the age of our mothers on that celebratory day.



In a box high on a shelf in my office closet, I find a cache of cards. I must have kept every one received that year.



Caitlin's especially adorable in Oshkosh B'Gosh shortalls of pale lavender. She's not sure what's happening but tears into the presents, tosses them aside, and becomes enchanted with the purple Miss Piggy balloon.




There are no kids to share this special day except for her big brother, Michael. Given their age difference of a dozen years, he seems more like an adult than a playmate. On this warm spring day, we enjoy a sit down meal, light one special candle, and sing "Happy Birthday." The cake's made by Kelli and it's luscious as always. The beautifully designed bear is composed of devil's food cake, not hollow inside. Kelli has thoughtfully added 'fur' to the body by artfully carving the frosting. We celebrate and smiles surround us.



This Friday, the 25th, Caitlin will be 28 at exactly 2:34 pm. She'll be at work contemplating her party the following evening. Birthdays are big in her life, especially her own. An eclectic box of assorted items has traveled from our house to hers. Inside she found five birthday cards. I'm a bit obsessed with birthdays myself.



First one birthday, then another. Each one unique, every set of memories worth saving. May this birthday be sweetly savored.